A Stupid Design Misrepresented with a Visual Lie

This might be the worst house design of all time in the Star Tribune Homes section. It looks innocuous at first:


The first thing I noticed was that the living area for cars (see floor plan) is as large as the main living area for humans. Then it registered that this gigantic garage is not shown accurately in the 3D rendering above: that version shows only a one-car garage, because the creators know that a three-car garage is ugly and out of balance with the rest of the house.


Once you get into the details of the floor plan, it gets even stranger. Starting from top left, we have two bedroom "suites," each with its own powder room and a shared something that must have a shower in it but it's hard to tell. You access these rooms past a series of lockers through a Mudroom, past the garage entry. Very homey.

Switching to the main part of the house, you enter through the front door via an open porch and into a foyer with a coat closet (pretty typical), but that's when it gets weird. To the right of the foyer is the laundry room. The Laundry Room! Right in a public part of the house, with its window overlooking the front porch.

And that laundry room and the other rooms across the front of the house appear to be arrayed along a wide hallway or gallery, which is basically a waste of space. Why is it there?

The master suite wing on the right side of the house also includes a space-wasting hallway (with two shallow closets along it), leading past a giant bathroom on its way to the Master Bedroom in the back corner of the house. At the opposite end of the wing, through the bathroom (as is all-too-typical in these megamansion houses), sits the the Master Closet, also with a window overlooking the front yard. And the Master Closet, get this, has its own closet. Probably for shoes? I don't know. There appears to be a secret door from the Master Closet to the hallway where the Laundry Room is.

This is where the sentence goes about how this house is a metaphor for everything that's wrong with our culture, yada yada, but after last night's Twitter post, I don't have the energy for it.

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So many past posts about the Star Tribune Homes section. So much to love to hate.