Saturday, December 25, 2010

The Season of Lights

Festooned Christmas lights and figures on a house
Back in 2004, Minnesota Public Radio held a contest for the best alternate-lyric Christmas song.

My daughter and I read through most of them, and were happy that Lynn Joachim of Scandia, Minn., was one of the winners because of her clever words and acerbic message.

Here's Lynn's version of "Up on a Housetop":

All little children
Drop their jaws

At the giant Santa Claus
He stands in the driveway
12 feet high

Waving at all the

Oh! Oh! Oh!

Watch it glow

Oh! Oh! Oh!

Melting the snow
Turn on the light switch,
Tick tick tick.
Spinning the meter
Just for kicks

Shepherds surrounding
Santa's sleigh

Need a map
To find their way

Through the tin soldiers
And candy canes

Flashing so brightly
They're seen by planes


Next to the manger,
A Spongebob stands,

Wishing peace for
All the land.

Joined by Snoopy
And Mickey, too,

Baby Jesus and


"Baby Jesus and Scooby-Doo" -- I never forgot that part. MPR still has the recorded version on its website (although I can't get it to play).

Here are a few sparkly photos of light displays that may have inspired Lynn's lyrics.

Festooned Christmas lights and figures on a house

Giant inflated Santa and Christmas lights on a house

Festooned Christmas lights and figures on a house

Festooned Christmas lights all over trees and house


Michael Leddy said...

Oh those lights.

But driving on a rural route at about midnight recently, I found myself surprisingly grateful to the people who had lights going — their lights seemed like a generous gesture to those on the road.

Daughter Number Three said...

I come from just such a rural area. My family is very fond of going out for a drive to see the lights.