Sunday, July 9, 2017

Your Very Own Trump Train

Not long after the Bradford Exchange ad for the Life of Christ ran in Parade magazine, the same company ran a full-page ad for The President Trump Express:

It’s a working, HO-scale electric train that comes to you over six months.

  • Shipment 1: “Donald Trump 45th President” diesel locomotive
  • Shipment 2: “Make America Great Again!” engine and FREE track, power pack and speed controller
  • Shipment 3: “America First” vista dome car
The track, power pack, and speed controller are given to you “free,” though they are “a $100 Value!”.

The copy below the photo is worth a read:
“I will fight for you with every breath in my body and I will never ever let you down.”

So promised Donald John Trump in his inaugural address to the American people after becoming our 45th President. To commemorate this remarkable time in our nation’s history as our new President assumes the responsibility of boldly guiding America’s future, Hawthorne presents the President Trump Express!

Boldly Decorated! Authentically Detailed!

This classic and real working electric train is decorated with memorable images of President Donald Trump from his history-making campaign and inauguration plus his stirring messages of patriotism and American greatness. You’ll marvel at the wealth of authentic details on this heirloom-quality, HO-scale train collection that’s masterfully crafted with solid metal chassis and gleaming gold-tone wheels for years of enjoyment!
And don’t forget, it’s an “Outstanding Value!”. The first shipment costs $79.98 (broken into three payment of $26.66), and the same amount is charged for each of the two other shipments. So that's $239.94 total, plus $29.97 in shipping ($9.99 each time).

My friend the model train fan tells me the front engine is an F8 diesel, a design that dates from the 1940s. Appropriate to Trump. The second car (described as an engine) doesn’t include a motor, I’m sure, so it’s really just a boxcar with a different undercarriage.

The cars are said to have solid metal chassis, so that implies the rest of the train is plastic.

So, three cars and enough track to make a 3'x4' oval for $270. While model trains vary a lot in price depending on their quality, it seems pretty likely to me this one should be priced at half that much.

But this is the land of the free and the home of the sucker-based profit, so have it at it, Trump fans.


Michael Leddy said...

Does the train run off the rails and spontaneously combust? Hope so!

On a semi-related note, I bought a Sunday local paper recently (to use while doing some painting) and was amazed at what’s become of Parade. Not that was ever especially terrific, but gosh, it’s almost free of content beyond ads.

Daughter Number Three said...

I wonder if anyone on the Trump campaign considered the metaphorical problems of trains. Hmm. Given their careful way of doing things generally, I'm sure they were very thorough about that.

I know what you mean about Parade. It's not what it used to be, even though that was never something to write home about.