Wednesday, January 13, 2010

A Rant on a Monster House

Someone built an 8,000-square-foot, custom McMansion in 2002 for their family with five sons (that's 1,143 square feet per person). But by 2010, they're selling it.

What went wrong?

Do they have to relocate the family somewhere else because they've been kicked even farther upstairs at work? Are mom and dad getting divorced? Did somebody lose a job, so they can no longer afford the obviously gargantuan payments?

This isn't just any suburban house, either. It's got a tiki bar...

Photo of an expensive-looking tiki bar

...and two-story, floor-to-ceiling windows with a stone fireplace...

Lots of windows and a stone fireplace

...overlooking a huge pool.

Large pool overlooked by badly designed back of a suburban house

(I can't get over how overblown the back of this house is. It looks more like a Wisconsin Dells resort than a house.)

There's also a media room with stadium seating and remote-controlled sound-proofing curtains. Other details mentioned in the story include Brazilian tigerwood flooring, landscaped grounds (11 acres) with lighted fountains and ponds, a lighted hockey rink, and "a heated pole barn with water and electricity that can be used to store 'toys'." Somehow, I bet every one of those lighted fountains has the same level of taste as the tiki bar or the "Tuscan-style main floor master suite."

As the Star Tribune's Sunday Homes section said, this house was "Built for fun" and "You can have it for $1.685 million."

I should also point out that it's located in Buffalo, Minnesota, which means it's at least an hour from Minneapolis, so whoever buys it is likely to get in some quality commuting time instead of living the good life at the house they spend all their time paying for.

Or maybe if someone really wants to spend that much money, they could live somewhere with reasonable comfort and a more ecologically thoughtful location, and donate the difference to someone who really needs it.

1 comment:

Jeanne said...

"Three of the bedrooms have secret play spaces." What??? Rant on, Pat. I'm completely creeped out.